Look, a week has already passed. By this time next week everything will be back in its right place and I will have a beautiful new kitchen. In the meantime, I will continue to be inventive with my microwave, wash up in my bath and, today and tomorrow, walk out my front door, down the side path, up the back steps and, finally, swing through the back door into my bathroom, until we’re able to walk on the newly-polished kitchen floorboards. Fun! Convenient! Not …
The thing that flummoxes me is that people DO choose to live like this for “fun”. Seriously, WHY DO PEOPLE DO IT TO THEMSELVES? Caravanning, I mean? “OK, family, we’re going on holiday in our caravan. We will have some, but by no means all, of the conveniences of home, and drive far away from our comfortable actual home to park in close proximity to complete strangers who may be awful or crazy, and who we will have to listen to and interact with for the duration of our stay whether we want to or not. You will wee and poo either in a chemical toilet or have to walk some distance to use shared facilities. Washing yourself will be a pain. Washing your clothes will be a pain. Finding things will be a pain. And, on four of the seven days we’re here, there will be torrential rain. Our caravan will leak, and it will leak onto our bedding, which will then smell. You will never want to eat baked beans or sausages again. Mosquitoes will try to drain you. And we will be seething with resentful feelings towards each other by the end of day three.”
Yes yes yes, I know it’s not always that bad. But why risk it? Book a nice room in a nice hotel with a nice view and a nice bar, freshly laundered sheets and towels daily, food cooked for you, and free beauty products.
Now that’s a holiday.